Following your heart
Here I am writing my very first blog and I`m not sure which emotion is the strongest.
Excitement or fear.
Excitement is there because I get to speak at last from my heart – which to me, means writing truthfully.
Keeping it real.
No bullshit or pretending to know it all.
And fear is there too. That old, familiar emotion which has a voice that I know far, far too well.
It sounds a bit like this.
`What have you got to say that`s any different to the thousands of blogs out there`. And..
`Why would anyone read what you have to say. They`re likely to either yawn or laugh at how juvenile your writing is`.
This voice is very strong, but I have called it my small voice.
Because if I listen to it, that`s exactly how life will stay for me.
Small. Safe. But restricted.
So I have a choice.
Do I stay on the familiar safe path of the small voice?
Or do I choose to stay heart centred which means listening to my intuition, my inner wisdom and write this blog.
But, hell, this would mean showing the real me.
My vulnerabilites, my demons and battles.
I feel a bit scared and exposed.
Maybe I should follow that small voice because it only wants to keep me safe. Protect me from making a fool of myself.
It wants me to resist showing anything other than being in control .
To keep the mask of having everything sussed.
It wants me to stick to the facts and write something about Health and wellbeing.
After all I am a Health coach now so I need to show that I know soooo much.. (which is bullshit by the way). And on and on it goes.
For years and years, I`ve danced to the tune of my small voice. Whenever a new opportunity came along, out it would come.
And it was in control.
The power of this voice when it rears up, can take my breath away and side swipe me.
Because underneath that small voice, what really feeds it, is a very simple one liner.
`What if I`m not good enough`?
And if I listen to it, my intution gets drowned out.
My heart doesn`t have a chance.
So I`m choosing today to live my life heart centred.
Which means following my dream of being a Health Coach.
Of writing and speaking.
The heart wins because I know that`s the real, authentic me.
And I`m finally understanding that whenever I speak, write or act from this place it`s never, ever wrong.
It can`t be.
My truth, my opinion, my feelings and my emotions are enough.
I am enough.
And it feels soooo good.
So here is my promise to myself and to anyone who may happen to read this.
This blog will always be about speaking from my heart.
It may be a bit rough or raw, but it will always be real.
So move over small voice and make some room.
It`s time for the real me to outshine you.
With love Yvette
26 October 2015